Love, bubs and life on our little farm

If I had a dollar for everytime someone said to me, "I don't know how you do it", well.... I would be buying myself a coffee every second day of the week.
 Normally, I internally shrug and think "what is there to 'do'? It's just life" But I am feeling a little worn out this weekend, like I haven't got much left and I have had those flashes of how/why do I do it.....

Bronte has been sick and Hubby and I had to tag team days off work to look after her. The list of things to to-do at home and at work has never felt longer - we spend hours a night working on work we have brought home from our jobs, the girls birthdays are 2 and 4 weeks away and so is their party. Elka's school is constantly demanding us to attend "parent events" during work hours that we struggle to find time to get to. I am possibly flying to the US for a work trip in 1.5 weeks time but am still yet to have the trip confirmed and flights booked, so I can't plan for me to be away properly. I have more work conferences than I care to think about in the next few months and they always manage to clash with Hubby's work events, so that involves organising our babysitter. I am supervising two Masters students (why did I agree to take two!) who need full time support and work reviewed. I have my second job lecturing at uni to squeeze in, preparing exam questions and marking assignments. I am trying to get my horse trained and up to competition standard, we are organising the major earth works to put a new arena in for me, building metres and metres of retaining walls for the new house extension area, we have huge gardens to care for and the paddocks and fences all need work. Hubby is trying to get fit and enter some marathons so he needs time to go for runs. The girls want to play with friends, do dance lessons and so on and we need to get them back into swimming lessons, let alone make time to see our friends. There are just not enough hours in the weekends for all of this.

There are not enough hours in the weekdays for that matter! In the evening, by the time we have arrived home, fed all the farm animals, the kids, played with them and put them to bed, prepared lunches for the next day, cooked dinner for the next night (since we get home late), done some work on our laptops, hit the gym weights and exercise bike and fallen into bed, it is 11.30pm and we finally get to chat and catch up.... to the loss of sleep. The kids have taken to waking us in the night to tuck them back in and then the alarm is unrelenting at 5.30am the next morning.

Recently, I have found myself wondering if life would be easier if we lived in a city suburban house with a tiny backyard that takes just 20 minutes to mow, that is only 10 minutes from shopping centres, the kids schools and not a monster commute to work. No farm animals to feed and rug, no fences to repair, no farriers to schedule, no bankrupting yourself to just buy the timber for one tiny piece of landscaping, no mud, no cleaning gutters to ensure your water tanks are clean for drinking, no watching the weather to worry about rain - just existing and "easy".

And then I get out of the car after my big commute and look out at the sun streaming through the gum trees, watch the girls delight in the joey jumping alongside the mother kangaroo up our driveway, hear the koalas grunting in the trees above the house, see my beautiful horses watching me expectingly and the ducks come waddling up from the dam, and laugh at the girls throwing on their gumboots and racing around the gardens or feeding the chickens.

And I wonder that "easy" might also feel a little empty in comparison.

This quote sums up what keeps me going...




And today - as busy as we were, we took the time to laugh at this idiot. My silly horse who is determined to annoy Hubby (having kicked him in the ribs last week) pulled up a plumbed in irrigation tap today and then was reluctant to hand it over. Life is never boring!