Love, bubs and life on our little farm

I love reading Mamamia - Mia Freedman's blog. She does a great job of discussion interesting, fun and pertinent topics (in my humble opinion!).

This one really caught me.

"Does feminism have a place in weddings? Do women give it all up for the one day they want to be treated like a princess in a Disney movie? Did you have any modern touches at your wedding or was it traditional all the way?"

I am pretty non-traditional - I work despite having small children, not for the money but for my career. And despite being on maternity leave and therefore being full time at home currently, I don't do all the housework - as I have mentioned before I don't even know in which of my husbands clothes drawers are his socks and undies. We share housework and we share farmwork - I still did farmwork 36 weeks pregnant.
I have a great deal of respect for where feminism has gotten us. But I like to think these days that us Australian women don't have to fight for rights anymore etc, I just expect them. If salaries and numbers of women at the top tiers of careers increased, then I would be one happy non-traditional woman!

For my wedding - we did have a lovely princess-esque wedding. I did wear a big dress, we married in a little stone church and we put on a gorgeous reception at a winery. It had its traditional elements but now that I think back, I did add my non-traditional flavour. We married in a church despite being athesists but it was simply as it was the cheapest wet weather option (I have a knack of holding special events on days of insane rain downpours), and I was banned from talking at the meetings with the minister as I was so anti-Christian elements that Jase was worried I would put off the minister. We stripped the ceremony down to the bare minimum of "god mentions" and there was no way in hell I was uttering different vows to Jase so there was no "obey" in my vows.

I did wear a big dress but it wasn't white - it was gold and I had the highest spikiest gold and diamante stilletos on underneath (not that anyone could see them but they were there for me!). I didn't need to look virginal in anyway.

My father walked me down the aisle but did not "give me away". I was not "his" nor now am I "my husbands". My father walked me down and we met my mother - they gave me a hug and kiss and I walked to my husband-to-be's side. This was important symbolism to me at the time.

I did not change my name - I am a published scientist and I love my name and all that I have acheived under that moniker. My children have my husbands name and it confuses people no end. Jase is often referred to as Mr "my name" as people meet me first and just assume my last name is from him. I do not use Mrs - I use Ms or my PhD-earnt title of Dr.

We drove away from our reception in our own car - and we unloaded our wedding gifts from the car into our house before heading to our hotel. It was lovely and down to earth.

Did you add some non-traditional elements to your wedding?

We have had a brand new fancy pants biocycle septic and grey water recycling system hooked up as a requirement of the next steps of the extension (our old septic tank had to be knocked in to make room for our wrap around verandahs on one side).

I love having non-smelly cleaner water (than our old grey water system) coming out in multiple sprinklers in one of our horse paddocks, I have plans to sow some rhodes grass seed there to reap the benefits of constant watering.

But in order to set up the new system, the water and septic had to be disconnected over two days and the entire backyard dug up. Hmmm not what I wanted to experience with a newborn and a toddler, so I packed up and headed to my parents lovely farm in the Byron Bay hinterland. Good choice it turned out as Bronte had a wonder week growth spurt those days and I was exhausted!

However I came home to this
This is our current entry to the house as the front verandahs have been ripped up to be replaced so we can't use the front door. The dug up ground was deep and not safe for poor Elka - her swing set was moved and it was all a little chaotic. However they filled the trenches the next day and the bob cat driver (who turns out is a nearby neighbour) even did some landscaping for me. So for once out of the last 4 weeks, I got something returned from messy to somewhat tidy! A nice change.

Bronte is 6 weeks now and has been experiencing a good "wonder week" - feeding often and grizzling (actually screaming is a better description) a lot. But the growth spurt has done its work and left her with some lovely new skills. She is cooing and making sweet noises and is a huge smiler now. She isn't too good at day sleeps, prefering cat napping in my arms but I am sorting out her sleeping in the basinette whenever we are home enough to make it worthwhile (I spend a lot of time out to avoid the construction noise). However, she still amazes me with her night sleeping. She goes down at 7pm as though she just knows that is Elka's bedtime and that Jase and I deserve our adult relax time! And I don't hear a peep from her until 1-2am, and last night it was 3am, then she quickly feeds, snuggles back to sleep and wakes at 6amish. Which means I am getting decent amounts of sleep. Very happy with that!

She still feeds well - prefering 2.5 hour gaps during the day but I try to stretch her to 3 hours as she gets colic from too much feeding otherwise. She loves her aquarium bouncer and playing on the activity mat with the flashing lights to stare at. She flinches when Elka swoops into speak loudly into her face but then beams at Elka with big open mouth smiles - I am desperately trying to catch this on the camera! Elka declares "that's my sister" and "I love her" whilst nearly launching poor Bronte with the violent bounces she produces from the bouncer.

Bronte had her 6 week check up with the paeds which went well, she has put on 1.2kgs in 5 weeks and is now 5.4kgs and 58cm long - a good grower as the paeds said! He isn't too concerned about her possible hearing problems as she clearly reacted when the muted office phone rang whilst he was examining her. However, this remains to be clarified - I am still waiting to be contacted for her follow up hearing tests. If she does have mild hearing problems rather than just conductive hearing loss from excess fluid from birth, then we will support her through it :) and I will feel blessed that its only mild hearing problems.

I had my 6 week check up with the obs - nothing remarkable either, he was pleased with my stomach muscle repair, as am I. I thought it might have taken longer than 6 weeks for the massive abdominal separation to join up but as the horseriding post previously contests I managed to fix it with the exercises. My pre-pregnancy jeans are fitting much better now - one pair are even getting loose around the hips thanks to Bronte's non stop feeding most likely, it does take it out of you!

However, thanks in part to the construction and to juggling two kids, I am getting a little stir crazy and am dying to do more exercise. Its difficult in a rural setting as there are no footpaths to walk along and our roads are rough, have no shoulders and are high speed - not safe for a toddler and a pram! So we walk up and down our driveway.. but again I can't do that with all the construction vehicles coming and going as well as taking up a lot of the paddocks. So its the impatient wait for the weekend, in order to have Jase mind the kids so I can ride :)

5 weeks post birth and I felt ready to jump into the saddle. Spech has had his ground work to build up his back and neck muscles for a few weeks now and I have built up my core muscles and let my pelvis recuperate. And finally, I fit back into my jodphurs...

I won't lie, mounting for the first time was not pretty! But it all felt pretty good once I got going, although it makes you realise how weak you truly are. But I know it will all take time.

I like to keep a diary of our training progress, so here goes. Spech was stiff to the right but happy to do turns on the forehand, rein backs and a little resistant leg yield to the right. He is over bending a little and needs to be pushed forward from behind. I need to concentrate on straighter posture, shoulders down and back and my hands need to be shorter and higher. I need to keep my leg contact low and firm. I copped a buck in the trot which is normal for Spech when he is fresh and not going forward properly. But overall a very good first workout for having 10 months off!

Yep so far, the house extension has involved more destroying of our existing house and verandahs then anything else. But its all for good in the long run.

We briefly panicked when the footings went in and we could see outlines of rooms - they didnt look nearly big enough! But we got out the measuring tape and measured the room dimensions out and compared them to our existing living spaces and no the rooms are still generous sizes and we are just struggling to visualise them properly from flat footings.

This is what we started with, the left side is where the extension is going, it will protrude at right angles from the existing house so this front garden will be more like a courtyard (as the shed is perpendicular on the right side of the house)

This is the side of the house that the extension is coming out of and the deck will be on piers off this hill. We had the excavator that did the cutting of the fill, move those fruit trees to our top garden where we are starting an orchard.


Goodbye back verandah - half of it is being replaced as well as new verandahs being added around the extension. That window is Elka's room and she is still living in it!


Digging the footings, this area will be our walk in robe and ensuite bathroom


Concrete pouring for the footings



The footings poured - this front area is the double carport and the study. Also shows the view that the deck will have over the dam.


Todays work included knocking out the existing brickwall to make way for the new living area and to join the slabs together

So much to go but its getting exciting (and oh so messy!)

We have officially been a family of four for a month now. I have loved having Jase home for this time - he has been able to provide order to the chaos that has been all that we have had to deal with.

The extensions are moving along well, despite some delays thanks to the complications of living rural and having septic and grey water pipes throughout the areas we need to dig footings. Once they are sorted we will be able to get cracking with the exciting stuff like a full slab and frames! I will show some pics soon.

The construction site is not fun to live in the middle of. However we haven't suffered as badly as our animals are. The horses are permanently locked out of their favorite (and largest) paddock which means that during the hardest time of year for grazing, they are missing out on decent feed. Furthermore, anytime we have a large truck come in, they need to drive across our paddocks which involves pulling down two fences and banishing the horses to their most hated top paddock. Our ducks are creatures of habit and are not dealing well with their walkways being blocked by a big extension. We dug the 5 foot deep pier holes for the new slab and verandahs and Jase and I joked that we hoped our blind duck Albert wouldn't end falling down the hole in the early morning when they come up to the house from the dam for their morning feed. Sure enough the next morning, our builder knocks on our back door and asks if we are missing a pet duck. There he was stuck down this narrow deep hole, poor boy. They were able to scoop him out and he recovered some dignity with a good shake before quacking off. Apparently wasn't enough to dissuade him from coming that way as the next morning he had fallen down the hole again!


We also have had council trying to trap some foxes on our property for the last few weeks (humanely of course). We have seen the foxes quite happily ignoring the trap and walking past it. We did however manage to trap one of our almost tame magpies, who wasn't too impressed!

We had a nice break down at my parents farm near Byron Bay although it was freezing cold and Elka picked up a chest cold. Bronte has had her 4 week growth spurt and was feeding every 2-3 hours throughout the night which was tiring. She has thankfully gone back to her 7hrs and then 4 hrs night sleeps now and with some wind medicine she is seeming alot more settled in general. We are encouraging sleeping in the cot rather than in our arms in the hope that my life will be easier next week when Jase goes back to work. She is very aware now and giving us big gummy smiles which are just beautiful - she started the open mouth smiles just 2 days before Elka did..


I am feeling quite well in myself after getting over a lovely head cold. Some women just love havign a pregnant belly, I am the opposite, I just love having a waist! I have been working on my ab exercises and getting back into the paddock work (shoveling horse poo and pushing wheel barrows is just like a gym workout with the added benefit of being free and getting work done around the farm!). I am hopeful to start riding again next weekend - Spech is responding well to his lunge work and I might be soft and lacking muscle tone but the best way to get it back is to get back in the saddle, its going to hurt at first!



Elka has settled into her role as a big sister - she loves to pat Bronte and kisses her endlessly. She was rocking and shushing her baby today just like I have been with Bronte. She tells kids that she meets at the park about Bronte, I have to laugh watching her tell the disinterested kids as she points frantically at Bronte in my arms. She has loved having four weeks of lots of Daddy time. This is her today pushing her wheelbarrow with Daddy coming back from feeding the horses their morning hay. Gorgeous!


Life is good but set to get a lot crazier next week as Jase works long hours and I will be here keeping the farm going, liasing with the builder and juggling the two littlies. Not to mention I have things booked in for everyday next week except Monday. Oh well life is never boring!

So 2 year olds are bloody hard work. So much so that I have sent mine 2 hours away to stay with my parents so I can enjoy some one on one time with Bronte. She is far from in exile though as she adores her Nanny and Poppy and their farm, asking repeatedly to visit them.

In fact, she is so happy that she used the word love today in the correct context for the first time. A beautiful moment that I have been looking forward to. But in true toddler style - it wasnt to Jase or I or even the beloved grandparents. Oh no, she said "I love Nelly" to Nanny and repeated it when Nanny quized her. Who is Nelly? Nelly would be my parents skanky white pet chicken - the most neurotic dirt stained scaredy cat of a chicken you will ever meet.

Yep there is the reward for my 2 years of hard work, teaching and cherishing. Got to love toddlers. Cause apparently they love chickens!

My littlest one is no longer a sleepy newborn. She opens her eyes and really looks around. She loves swatting the noisy toys on her play mat and she is one determined miss who goes straight to screams if she is not content. She is a brilliant feeder and loves cuddles. She will drift off to sleep happily in my arms and spring her eyes open as soon as I try to put her in the cot. This is so different to Elka who was an independent bub who loved to self settle and wasn't keen on being held to sleep.

She already has strong blue eyes - the nurse the other day asked if my other daughter had really blue eyes and when I said yes, she said that Bronte would too. Elka's eyes are quite stunning so I am pleased that Bronte is blessed with pretty eyes too.

She likes to cat nap during the day, I am trying when I can to teach her to put herself to sleep in the cot as she is already waking after only one sleep cycle and I don't want to face this problem later on. She has responded well to patting to sleep, although we do occasionally resort to the dummy, which is all new to us as Elka never had one. However, she is a champion sleeper at night - we put her down at about 6-7pm and she doesn't stir until 1am and then sleeps through to 6-7am. I was not expecting that from a 3 week old - it has been wonderful!

She is starting to give me good eye contact and I got the beginnings of an opened mouth grin yesterday, it was lovely. I loved those first heartwarming grins.

She is in 000 now and collecting little fat chins that roll down onto her neck. Sometimes I marvel at how alike to Elka she can be and other times they look so very different. Its so fun watching and wondering how she will grow and change. Its quite fun being the second time as I know roughly what is coming and am looking forward to each stage whilst being quite relaxed about it all.

I am still loving having Jase home to help me - but I am starting to mentally prepare for when I am alone and juggling the two. Elka is taking her big sister role quite seriously and loves to rock or bounce Bronte or pat her if she is crying, very sweet.

We have Bronte's big hearing test next week - they sent the instructions today and I didnt know whether to laugh or cry at the letter telling me not to let the baby sleep in the car on the way to the test and to have them turn up hungry and ready for sleep. Maybe an easy task for people in the city but we have a 1hr drive simply to get to the hospital and I have no close family to "help keep the baby awake in the car" like they suggest. I will have to drive in early and then walk the streets close to the hospital for an hour or so to keep her awake I think. Oh the joys! Hoping she passes - her hearing seems OK - she startles at noises and Elka is quite gifted at waking her up so hoping that it will all be alright.

Elka turned 2, we took her to Seaworld, our builder has well and truly started work on the house extension, we have had both sets of grandparents staying, we threw Elka's 2nd Birthday Party, we all caught gastro and then a chest cold, we took the little ones to visit Jase's work, I have started doing heavy farm work again and Bronte had a rough few days with colic pain. Mostly fun times but man am I tired and would love my voice back!

I was not so sure how Elka's 2nd Birthday Party would go as we were combining 4 toddlers 2nd Birthdays as they are all born within 10 days of each other and we thought one big party was the way to go. We booked out a play centre and it was fantastic! Elka played so much that her face was bright red and her fringe stuck to her head with sweat but she did stop playing to blow out the candles on her butterfly cake thankfully!

As for blogging, I might do some progress shots on the house sometime soon :) In the meanwhile, a few shots of Elka's birthday and her party.

Last pregnancy I did the same thing - here. We tend to focus on the sweet newborn and forget about ourselves, so I like to take a moment to reflect on how I am going.

My stitches are feeling mostly healed - just a little ouchy, in particular when sitting at certain angles. I am happy to say that with religious stomach exercising, I have brought my abdominal seperation from over 4 fingers wide to back to less than 1 finger wide. I wish I could say the same about the stretch marks around my poor saggy belly button - its all a little wrinkly and not pretty but I know it will take time.



My bump is just a little stubborn one now - its going down much slower now, I think until I can start some serious pliates and horseriding I will have to accept that it will stay sticking out a little. But I got my flat tummy back last time so I plan to do it again!

I still feel a little weak in the pelvis and get a bit of a bruised feeling if I am walking alot and carrying things. Ditto to a terrible lower back ache. But my reading tells me this is to be expected as the pelvis is still so soft. I am avoiding lifting the 15kgs of Elka as much as I can but am trying to do little lifts close to the ground to start getting my back and core muscles used to it as Jase will be going back to work soon and I need to be strengthened.

Bronte is a good bub at nights - feeds and goes back to sleep and often will do a 6-8 hour stretch so I am feeling not too tired. Although when work rings or emails me I do find that my mind is feeling pretty muddled still - damn baby brain!

I can get a little frustrated and overwhelmed with the workload of a new bub and a cheeky toddler but the feeling passes pretty quickly. Overall I am feeling pretty happy and cheery - I do think that the noise and inconvienence of the house extensions might get to me some days though. But I just have to remind myself that "this too shall pass" and that I need to soak up having my last newborn in the house.

I can't believe its been two years but at the same time I can barely remember life without her little shadow beside me. I haven't done an update on Elka in ages so its definitely about time.

She is so much fun and great company. She constantly has Jase and I laughing or amazed by the things that she says and picks up. Her language is very impressive for a 2yr old - daycare is constantly commenting on it, they love having her around as she chatters in full sentences all day long keeping the carers company. She was so far ahead of her peers at daycare that they have already moved her out of the toddler room and into the Pre-Kindy room. Her vocab is pretty impressive, she is using first person really well and can count to 13, her abc's need work but she can pick out E, A and M on a computer keyboard when asked and she can also spell her own name out aloud. She understands a lot of abstract concepts and is even learning time and days. She understands left and right when applied to her feet. She loves to play pretend games - she goes "shopping" with a handbag or a basket, she loves to host tea parties and charges us $2 for her coffees and we pretend to drive a car together. One of her favorite games is Hide and Seek with us, she will learn against the wall with her eyes closed and count and then search for us. However in reverse, she is terrible at staying hidden and will shout out which room she is in.

She has discovered television with a passion and loves to be a couch potato on her little lounge. I have to drag her outside somedays. She adores In the Night Garden and Play School and Sesame Street are becoming popular also.

She has little quirks that I just love - she wears her sunglasses in the car all the time and demands to wear them at nigth to block the headlights of oncoming cars. Makes me laugh every time I see her in the dark sitting there with the glasses on - a total diva! She fetches her little broom to push things out from under the lounge with the handle - we didnt teach her that, she picked it up herself. She is very good at running - I have read that this is a later milestone? but she is a very fast little runner and has become very good at climbing park equipment too. Her memory is amazing - we can mention something once and she will always remember and bring it
up at the relevant time.

Her swimming is coming along really well - she can swim underwater for the whole width of the teaching pool, she is learning to kick and paddle at the same time and she can go down, touch the bottom of the pool and swim to the surface to either Jase or the swim step.

She is a doting sister who loves to hold Bronte and kiss (and poke) her. She does however like to wake Bronte up for fun. I thought she would resent the new baby and I have been blown away by her love and excitement for Bronte.

As much as she is a happy little soul, the terrible twos have kicked in. She can be very defiant and she loves to get in trouble. She loves the attention that doing something naughty gets her unfortunately. The most worrying of her behaviour has become deliberate running away - particularly at the shops (out of shop doors) or in car parks (away from our car). Since I am now juggling a newborn, this behaviour does really worry me as I would hate for her to get hurt, lost or hit by a car :(
We are struggling with discipline - she loves timeout so it doesn't really work. She is currently getting warnings and then losing something she loves as punishment. We are also trying to simply ignore some behaviour, since it is often attention seeking, withdrawing any attention seems to be the best punishment in itself.

I am very excited for her birthday - we have bought her a swing and slide set. Swings are her absolute favorite thing so she is going to be so overwhelmed. I have cooked two of the three cakes required for all of her different celebrations (daycare, her actual bday and her party). We are taking her to Seaworld for the day on her bday as she loves the animals and the toddler rides. She is excitedly counting down until her Bday party which is a shared bday with three of her friends - we have booked out a play centre. She is having a butterfly theme so Mum has sewn her a gorgeous dress and I am making a cupcake cake in the shape of a butterfly. She chose the theme weeks ago and is very much looking forward to her cake!

I keep thinking "this time 2 years ago", I think the memories have been freshened by Bronte's recent birth. When she talks to me in long sentences about things that have happened in her day, I find myself blinking and thinking where did my baby go! I love how a little person has grown out of the snuggly bub. Its the most amazing thing.

Happy Birthday Chicken. Heres to many more together xoxo

Bronte and I dropped Elka to daycare today and then hit the shops. Its been awhile since I have got to shop for myself properly. I hit the Witchery sale and tried on a million things but left with this top, which I showed in my last post in a lovely shade of violet.



I also grabbed a cute striped singlet. I then had a mission to find a black drape cardigan to wear over the violet top for Elka's party - Bardot came up with the perfect one and over $50 off it too!
Then I hit a shoe sale and bought two new pairs of boots. To be totally honest I probably didnt need them - I have more knee high boots then I can fit on my shoe rack but I LOVE them. I have been wearing boots over jeans since I went to Europe in 2006 and fell in love with the stylish Italian women all rocking that look. I wanted a new pair for Elka's bday and I couldnt decide between chocolate and black, they both have buckles, I just love buckles on shoes for some reason - fortunately they were having a 50% off second pair deal, so how could I say no. I still havent decided which ones I will be wearing!





By this stage Bronte had been kicked out of the pram thanks to all the shopping bags hehe. Can't say how good and strange it felt to be wandering the same shops I was in less than two weeks ago in early labour, feeling much slimmer and able to buy normal sized clothes again! Pregnancy is a wonderful thing but how I love having my body back and a beautiful baby in my arms instead :)

Its recovery time now. Time for everything to deflate and return from being stretched. Pregnancy amazes me but post pregnancy recovery has amazed me even more - both times.

It may not work the same for everyone but my tummy shrinks very quickly - its now 11 days post labour and I only have a tiny pot belly down low. I am almost sad as I can no longer cup it or rub it as I have been so used to. But then I remember that I get to have warm snuggly newborn hugs instead and that is so much nicer. I am religously doing my core stomach exercises and working on my pelvic floor. I can do up a few of my pre-preg jeans, including my size 9's so I am feeling OK despite the fact that the majority of clothes still have to wait...

My stitches are a bit twingy from healing but have stopped being painful. And most importantly I am starting to feel stir crazy in the house and am staring out longingly at the horses. I think I am almost ready to start farm and horse work again - just gently lunging etc but laying down the foundations for both the horse and I to be fit and ready for riding by 6 weeks. Excited!

But in the meanwhile, I just don't know what to wear. I had been avoiding the winter fashions as I didnt want to depress myself whilst huge and pregnant and not able to buy them. I am living in one pair of maternity skinny jeans with boots over the top and tights... but all my tops are either tight which still shows the little pot belly or loose and baby doll which makes me shudder and want to burn them from association with wearing them endlessly during the last few months.

Its Elka's bday next week and we have her party coming up. I want something nice to wear... a shopping trip is looming. But I need some inspiration, I don't really know where to begin. Am currently searching the web to inspire myself. Its like being a shopping beginner all over again!

The Witchery sale is calling me most of all. Although I always end up buying silk tops from Witchery... not the smartest buys for someone with a messy milk dripping newborn, she destroys my tops currently in minutes when feeding..

I have my eye on this top - pretty but casual still for a play centre party..

Am always a sucker for a bow too

Feel free to share if you have seen some great sales around!

Thank you to everyone that has followed my journey and I have loved all of your lovely comments and support throughout. It is with great excitement that I can present Bronte's wonderful birth story as we move into the new stage of our lives as a family of four. I have a feeling that my blog may get a little neglected at times but I plan to keep it up as much as I can as this time is such a blur and I love being able to record it.

I had been experiencing prelabour for a week or two, lots of semi painful regular Braxton Hicks and back ache. I was barely sleeping and getting increasingly frustrated with myself. My tummy had measured 3-4 weeks ahead in fundal height since 30 weeks and I was incredibly uncomfortable. Not helped of course, by every strangers well intentioned comments about how I was carrying out in front and what a large baby it was going to be. My lovely parents took Elka home with them for the weekend, giving me a break from the whirlwind of life with a toddler and also giving Jase and I the chance to have a lovely weekend of nice meals out and shopping for Elka’s 2^nd birthday.

Monday the 30^th of May, at 39.5 weeks, my obs assured me it wouldn’t be long and that bubs was 3/5 engaged. The Tuesday, I stayed home all day (unusual for me) and felt very out of sorts and low spirited. That night I got a painful contraction every hour but just ignored them and tried to sleep. When I woke in the morning, my lower back was aching terribly and the pains had dropped to every 15 mins. Jase decided to stay home from work to give me some support and Mum, Jase and I drove into the city to take Elka to her Wednesday daycare day. We decided to wander around the shops to try and keep the contractions coming. I waddled very slowly and although we shopped for something like 5 hours, we barely covered more than a fifth of the shopping centre. Everyone else grabbed bargains in the sales but I was very disinterested in shopping altogether (in hindsight, a sure sign I was not myself!). We headed home to rest for a few hours. After a shower at 4pm, I noticed the intensity of the contractions increase, they had dropped to 8 mins apart and I could feel pressure. I rang the hospital and due to us living semi-rural, they wanted me to come in straight away as we had a good 40min drive. When I got off the phone, I realised I had had two contractions in that time and the phone call was only 3 mins long. Cue Jase rushing around like a madman feeding all the farm animals and finishing our bag packing. Mum was off picking up Elka from daycare, so we spoke to her and she decided to meet us at the hospital. Despite Jase looking stressed and swearing that he wasn’t delivering bub on the side of the highway, we had a great trip in, even through the current local roadworks that normally require a 15 minute wait at a stop/go man, much to his relief. I remember being quite uncomfortable and watching the cars digital clock and noticing that the contractions were 3-4 mins apart. We met Mum at the front of the hospital and gave Elka a big hug and kiss. She was sad that she wasn;t allowed to come in with us but we wanted her to go home to have dinner and to get a good sleep. I watched her little face as she stared back at us as she was carried through the twilight to the car to go home, and realised that was the last time she would be my only child.

We met our lovely midwife Evie who ushered us through to our birthing suite. We were pleased it was a different room to the one we had with Elka as we really wanted a different experience this time (Elka’s was an 18hr labour with no dilation after two weeks of prelabour and hours of strong contractions, failure to progress in 2^nd stage labour requiring being confined to bed, ARM, multiple syntocin drips, gas that made me hyperventilate, a failed epidural with four top ups that didn’t work, nearly 2 hours of pushing, a broken vacuum that sent the obs flying across the room and an episiotomy).

Evie asked our birth plan as she hooked me up for monitoring – we specified that we would prefer limited interventions, particularly syntocin and that we weren’t keen on pethidine or gas and were hopeful for an active birth as long as possible. The monitoring trace showed good peaking contractions every two minutes or so but they were only lasting a minute. I had an internal and we were relieved to hear that I was 3cm dilated. Evie unhooked me and left us to our active birthing. I walked and stomped the pain away in the contractions or lent over the bed on a bean bag and just breathed through the pain. We headed to the shower and I enjoyed the double shower heads. We even ate some of the hot dinner that was delivered to the suite. Evie started some more monitoring as she was concerned that I wasn’t progressing and sure enough the contractions hadn’t changed much. We went for a slow walk around the ward and to check out our room as we had requested a double bed room for Jase to stay. When I got back, the obs arrived, commented that I looked way too cheery and did another internal. Much to our disappointment, I was still only 3cm dilated after 3 hours of contractions. He decided to break my waters at 8.15pm and after watching the end of Masterchef with us, he declared he was going home for a few hours and would expect to see us again around midnight to see how things had progressed.

There was a large amount of meconium in my waters so according to hospital policy I was now required to stay on the bed with constant monitoring on. They also put a clip into bubs head for a constant heartrate monitor as her heartbeat was too consistent and not rising and falling with the contractions like they wanted it to be. Evie left us to deal with the now stronger contractions how we wanted. I rolled slightly onto to my right side and Jase would press hard on my lower back through the contractions whilst I hit the bed loudly with my open palm to distract myself with the movement and sound and I was saying loudly the mantra of “its good pain, its good pain”. The contractions were now very strong and were not releasing before the next one was starting and I was whinging about how much water was still gushing out. By 9.10pm (55 mins after having my waters breaking), the intensity was so strong, I was yelling my mantra, slamming my hands and thinking desperately that I would need some pain relief as midnight seemed a very long way away! I suddenly felt incredibly nauseous and started demanding a sick bowl. Then with the next contraction – the pain had changed and all I could scream was “ow” rather than my mantra and I was making primal grunting noises and I realised I was pushing. Evie the midwife came running in, worried to hear that I was pushing. She tried to get me to stop as she thought it was way too soon and quickly did an internal before saying “wow you are 9cm”, she ran off to call the obs to get him to rush in from home. Jase and I were shocked – from 3cm to 9cm in less than one hour, and a minute of nausea to indicate transition. I started pushing with massive primal grunting – I have never felt anything like that pushing urge, it is the most powerful thing my body has ever done. I remember thinking that I would be so frightened as a pregnant woman if I walked past the birthing suites and heard the noises that were coming out of me!

The obs came rushing into the room, threw his keys on the table and said “oh I better get my gumboots on!”. He and Jase took a side each and coached me through the pushes. I could feel her moving down with every push and Jase was so supportive and encouraging – I could see in his face that this was really happening and I felt so positive despite the pain and shaking legs from the adrenalin of it all happening so fast. I was still in disbelief that it could be happening so quickly after Elka’s 18 hour labour. After a few more contractions, I felt bubs crown and now instead of my grunting, I was screaming “ow ow ow” over and over, I think there was an F-bomb in there also, the obs tried to coach me to “push, don’t push, little pushes etc” but although I was listening I don’t think my body really was and I think this is what caused my tearing. Once her head was out she needed a lot of suctioning thanks to all the meconium and I could see that Jase was worrying but I felt calm. With the next contraction, her shoulders were delivered and I felt that fantastic feeling of her slithering out and being thrown up onto my chest immediately.

We were so unprepared for a fast labour that I was still in my bra and hospital nighty so we were desperately trying to get me all out of it so I could have bare skin time and so bubs could feed straight away. She latched straight on and continued to feed strongly for about 45 minutes. We could all tell she was a big bub and the midwife predicted over 4kgs – she was right, she weighed in at 4.17kg or 9pound3. Jase revealed that he thought she had had the cord around her neck but then had realised that it was just a big neck roll of fat!

After she had finally finished feeding and my second degree tearing was stitched up (requiring more local needles then I ever want to get in sensitive regions again!), I got up for a shower and had a massive temperature dive that resulted in uncontrollable shaking. So I had to be taken in a wheelchair wrapped in warmed blankets for Bronte’s wash. It was a quiet night in the maternity ward – only 2 births and so all of the midwives were coming to congratulate me as they heard it was a 9pd3 bub born drug free. I hadn’t thought much of it, being on a high of seeing my baby and having had a labour with pain relief and one without, I now realised that either way is simply a great achievement in itself, but it was nice to have people acknowledge that she was a big bub for me and that it was damn hard work! I am just so pleased to have had such a positive birthing experience filled with love and laughter, Jase and I felt so close and it was a true team effort.

We settled into our lovely room and I spent a sleepless night buzzing on adrenaline whilst Bronte and Jase happily slept. Elka met Bronte the next morning and she was so excited and her face when she got to hold Bronte just melted my heart and was one of the best moments of my life. She still adores Bronte and may kill her with kindness. My parents minded Elka for our four night hospital stay so that we could rest and relax and bond with Bronte which was wonderful.

Bronte is a champion feeder. I am recovering well although the pregnancy chiro said that unfortunately due to the huge out in front bump that I had, I have the worst abdominal separation she has seen and she was sceptical that I would be back horseriding for at least 3 months. She did support my goal of 6 weeks however, so I have a lot of exercises to do to achieve this.

I am loving being a mummy of two and am smitten with my girls. Her name is because we loved the name Bronte, that its relatively uncommon and thought it worked with Elka being another strong girls name and it reminded us of Jase’s nannas name- Bonnie. Victoria is my middle name and I love it and it is in acknowledgement of my side of the family since both girls have Jase’s last name.

Bronte Victoria

9pd3 (4.17kg)

51cm, head 35.4cm

Labour – about 5 hrs 45mins all up

The all important pictures:

Elka meeting Bronte for the first time - she is smitten

My not so small girl in her going home outfit

Elka had made a welcome home sign with balloons and she ran straight past me to Bronte despite not seeing me properly for 5 days!

I am no longer pregnant!! I am so excited - newborns are so much more fun then whinging 39 week pregnant women ;)

Enjoying every single minute. She is an angel.

Introducing

Bronte Victoria
2nd June, 9.43pm
9pd3 (4.17kg)
51cm, head 35.5cm



I had the most fantastic birth and am trying to find the time to write up the story to share. Of course more photos to follow but I thought I would start with the very first pic of us together.

xoxo